Written by volunteer: Abby Custer
Do you struggle with confidence? If you’re anything like me, you may have used the phrase “hot mess” to refer to yourself on more than one occasion. Sometimes it feels like I can’t ever get it together. And while some of these “hot mess” experiences are laughable (like my recent lunch with friends where I looked down to find baby poop smeared all over my white shorts – talk about bad blowout timing), others strike a deeper chord.
We can all probably think of at least one person in our lives (and basically everyone on social media) who seems to have it all together. You know the type – stylish, organized, Pinterest polished, and ready to go. The truth is that deep down, none of us truly have it all together.
We all have different struggles, some are just more visible than others. At Compass, we celebrate each other. We acknowledge how unique and valuable each person is. We support each other because life can be hard!
And it’s okay to be vulnerable and let that struggle show. So often, we work really hard to pretend like we’re fine, everything is fine. When someone asks us how we are, our automatic response is “Good!” Even when it’s not. The better question to ask might be, what do I need to change in my life? How can I believe that I deserve better?
Sometimes when things get really quiet, my mind takes over and plants a tiny seed of self-doubt. It may seem innocent at the time, but before I know it, I find myself questioning everything about myself. Or worse, I make choices because I believe that I don’t deserve anything better. One place this can manifest itself is in our relationship choices. Maybe you are in a relationship right now (or have been in the past) where you aren’t being treated with respect. You tell yourself that it’s your fault that you are being treated this way, or blame yourself for the way it makes you feel.
You are worthy of someone else’s best, and if that’s not what you’re being given, it’s okay to expect more. It’s more than okay to expect respect and care from the people in your life. We all have different ideas of what it means to love and be loved, but if you are left feeling put down, discouraged, or otherwise negatively affected, it may be time to move on from a relationship or make a more permanent change in your life.
If you find yourself stuck in a pattern of self-doubt, believing lies that keep knocking you down, remember this – God created us in His image. He loves us so much and wants the best for us. It doesn’t matter what led you to this place, what matters is finding the strength to move forward in a more positive way. Here at Compass, we can help you to find that strength and inner confidence. It might not be easy or simple, but it will be worth it. You ARE worth it.